I Watched Every Disney Live-Action Remake So You Didn’t Have To
Here it is. My first ever listicle. I know people tend to look down on stuff like this but, trust me, it was a lot of work. I watched all 17 live action remakes (so far), and have come up with this handy dandy ranking of all of them. Disclaimer before we get started: I am not Roger Ebert. I am not a professional film critic. Everything you’re about to read is my own subjective opinion. If you disagree with the order or any movie placement, let me know. Now, then. Onwards
17. Rudyard Kipling’s The Jungle Book (1994)
By far and away the worst movie of the bunch. A blueprint on how not to adapt a beloved story. This movie was so bad, I only knew of it’s existence when I started this project. Three weeks ago, I was blissfully unaware that this affront to cinema even existed. This movie feels like it was based off Tarzan rather than The Jungle Book. The story bears no resemblance to the original, the entire cast is new characters that drastically alter story, Mowgli is an adult. Simply put, it’s not The Jungle Book.
16. 102 Dalmatians (2000)
Okay, this was a doozy. Sequels of remakes are always going to be tricky, because you’ve probably expended all the story in the first movie. Now, you’re out on a limb, having to decide what route to go with the story. Do you write an original story with the same characters, or do you create new characters and try to capture the magic of the original movie? This one did neither. Yes, there are original characters; in fact, besides Cruella, her driver, and one of the pups from the first movie, all the characters are brand new. The dogs charm, as dogs do, but it looked like, and felt like an obvious cash grab with no real plan on how to make it work.
15. The Lion King (2019)
Before I begin, I want to preface this by saying that this section is really tight. Most of the next few movies can be swapped around in the rankings. Now then, on to the second biggest disappointment of 2019. The Lion King is a movie that delivered on it’s promise. Problem is, it gave little else and actually held back in certain areas. It is a brilliant feat of animation; for 180 minutes, you feel like you’re watching real lions. But once that novelty wears off, you realize that you’ve seen this movie before. Some changes (like turning Scar’s legendary villain song into slam poetry) really just frustrate me. The lion cubs are cute and funny, but that’s not enough to save this movie from the gigantic shadow that is it’s near-perfect original.
14. The Lady and the Tramp (2019)
Disney was really feeling the remake bug in 2019. This is the second of five movies released in that year, no other year had more than two. But, to the movie. Another movie with talking animals. Talking live-action animals is always tricky because you can risk an Underdog situation but this movie handled it well. The mix of actual dogs and CGI worked wonderfully. Story-wise, the movie fixes some of the uncomfortable parts of the 1955 original (Siamese cats, anyone?), and takes liberties with the characters and the story itself. Playing the iconic dinner scene for laughs (intentional or not) was certainly an interesting road to go down. All in all, an enjoyable watch; though it probably doesn’t have high rewatch value.
13. Dumbo (2019)
The tale of the flying elephant. Dumbo pivots hard from the 1941 original by making it a family story as opposed to a tale of Dumbo’s rise to fame. Using the Farrier family as the center, and making the story about freeing Dumbo’s mom, was great. The elephant homecoming at the end and the new animal free circus is a nice resolution to the movie. I did not like having the circus folk sing Baby Mine because it just didn’t feel right. Michael Keaton is your typical megalomaniac who causes his own downfall. No great surprise there. I feel like the biggest thing though, is that you wouldn’t be able to guess that it was directed by Tim Burton.
12. Mulan (2020)
The legend of Mulan, based more on the original Chinese story than the 1998 classic. Mulan is a warrior who cannot be one because of tradition and culture. The emotion in the movie is palpable. You feel the weight of the lies she tells, you can feel the tension when she faces off with the Witch. You even feel a bit sad when the witch sacrifices herself to save Mulan. The action sequences and fight choreography are spectacular. The avalanche crushing scene is beautiful, and the supporting characters are great. Her dad, every the supportive #GirlDad. P.S. watch out for the special cameo.
11. Beauty and the Beast (2017)
It’s not how you look, it’s what’s inside that counts. This flick is actually quite good, in some places. Characterization was good. Belle, Maurice, Gaston, the Beast, and the servants/utensils were all written pretty well. The Beast is making jokes (fyi, I’m a sucker of a good joke), the love kinda builds organically as Belle comes to know the dude behind the fur and fangs. (Also, she def has a furry kink.) Flipside, the anthropomorphized inanimate objects just don’t translate well to live action, with the exception of Lumiere and Cogsworth. Miss Potts is pure nightmare fuel. The songs are great, until they decide to change or alter them for unknown reasons. Letting the spell play out and having all the servants change to actual objects kinda brings weight to the “quest”, plus having Agatha be the witch who cursed the Beast is a nice reveal.
10. 101 Dalmatians (1996)
This one was originally much higher, but upon review, it’s been dropped a few places. This movie was enjoyable. It is a direct adaptation of the original, a la Lion King. Same plot points, same actions, etc. The main reason I’d say this worked while Lion King didn’t is 1) the original movie came out in 1961, so we mostly don’t remember it as well as we remember The Lion King; and 2) they did this entirely in live action. Since they elected not to make the animals talk, the animal scenes felt like the most interesting pantomime. Having to decipher the emotions of Pongo and Perdita from barks and growls and whines creates a storytelling challenge. How do you let the audience know what the main characters are going through when they can’t talk? And yes, the dogs are the main characters. The rescue of the 99 pups is such a thrill, even more so by the fact that they can’t talk. I loved every second of it.
9. Aladdin (2019)
Yet another 2019 remake. Aladdin always had a long hill to climb because of the legendariness of one big blue Genie. Robin Williams’ Genie is one of the best vocal performances in animation history, and God bless Will Smith, he’s no Robin Williams. Don’t get me wrong, he was great, and he did try to make the role his own with his own special brand of Will Smith funny, but Genie belonged to Robin Williams. As for the rest of the cast, Mena Massoud was great as a fast-talking, fast-walking charmer. He owned that Aladdin charm and swag. Naomi Scott, excellent singing voice (go watch Lemonade Mouth), really felt like a princess. The switch in ambition from “I want to marry for love”, to “I want to be Sultan” makes her constant rejection of suitors feel kinda relatable. After all, who wants their life dictated to them by a stranger. Jafar is a classic megalomaniac, there’s really not much you can do with that. Overall, a good watch, but if you’re looking for the magic, go back to ‘92.
8. Cinderella (2015)
The original Disney Princess. The girl that every little girl wanted to be. This version of the story is much similar to the original, with the notable exception of almost all singing by the characters. Cinderella’s relationship with her parents is nice to see, we see her mother for the first time. The character contrast between Cinderella’s mother and step-mother, played brilliantly by Cate Blanchett, is excellent. The Prince is an actual character who has an impact on the story, as opposed to a walking, talking McGuffin. The Grand Duke being a wretched snake is a left-field but somewhat grounded take on the character since, after all it is his job to ensure the survival of the kingdom by any means necessary. Richard Madden is charming as Kit; the Captain of the Guard provides some emotional support and encouragement for the Prince; and the step-sisters are the step-sisters. Even the rats make an appearance, as actual rats who don’t do any sewing or singing. The fact that a sizeable amount of the cast don’t have names, only job titles, tells us that the story is really hyper-focused on Cinderella and the Prince which is good. Less bloat on the plot. Helena Bonham Carter as a ditzy and distracted Fairy Godmother is a win.
7. Christopher Robin (2018)
The movie starring the most philosophical bear to ever live. This movie stars Ewan McGregor as an adult Christopher Robin who learns the joy of playing again after having his imagination stolen by adulthood and life. If you loved the Winnie the Pooh books, you’ll absolutely adore this movie. Christopher learns that maybe work isn’t the most important thing in life, Pooh learns more about the real world, and Maddy learns that her Daddy used to have a lot of fun as a kid. The transition moment when Maddy takes Pooh and the gang to London to return her father’s papers is beautiful; the entire “expotition” is chaotic and hilarious. The Hundred Acre Wood gang are carbon copies of their original versions. I’ve always had a soft spot for period pieces, and this is a very good one.
6. Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (2019)
A sequel to 2014’s Maleficent, this movie succeeds at being a sequel of a remake, and a lot of it is down to the first movie. Because of the story choices made in the first one, this movie is a lot more untethered to the 1959 Sleeping Beauty and so can take more liberties with the characters. We learn of a whole race of “dark fae”, and escalating tensions between humans and magic folk. They use the “cursed baby” plot again, but this time as a political tool by Ingrith, who is, as manipulators go, one of the best in the business. Aurora’s naivete and sheltered nature is played on expertly, to the point where she even turns her back on the woman who raised her. The final battle between humans and Fae is a brilliant spectacle, and the color changing dress is a great reference to the original.
5. Alice in Wonderland (2010)
Here we are. The top five. The five best remakes, at least according to me. And coming in at number five is Tim Burton’s take on Alice in Wonderland. Unlike a lot of movies here, it is a sequel to the 1951 Alice in Wonderland. That choice allows for some interesting narrative choices. Alice is taken back to Underland and essentially lives through the events of the original but this time it’s with the knowledge that she’s been here before, even though she thinks it was a dream. The movie is really more based on Lewis Carrol’s book than the Disney movie. The psychedelic nature of Underland, the madness of it’s inhabitants; all these things are more prominent in the book. Alice’s parents, her father in particular, form the basis of her belief in the impossible and her ability to rise to the occasion to fulfil what was prophesied in the Oraculum. Helena Bonham Carter really owns the despotic dictator role; and, as usual, Johnny Depp is always a win. The man is just amazing. The movie, outside of Underland, is a period piece set in what I'm assuming is Victorian era England, with all the societal trappings that it entails. A really, really enjoyable watch.
4. Alice Through the Looking Glass (2016)
This movie is the third sequel to a remake in this list, and is by far the best. Continuing on from the first movie, Alice is a captain of a ship, still believing in the impossible. But the pressures of the time clash with her more progressive worldview. Lord Ascot intends to take her father’s ship from her and make her secretary (shudders). Cue a timely escape back to Underland where she has to save the Hatter from what can only be described as a disease unique to Underland. What follows is perhaps the best time travel story of the 2010s. The foreshadowing and eventual reveals, the nods to the earlier films (why Hatter and Hare stuck at the tea party), and using time to reveal the true nature of characters we thought we knew. Sacha Baron Cohen as Time is an inspired casting. A great action-adventure flick.
3. Maleficent (2014)
Maleficent, the movie that showed that you didn’t have to adhere to the original story to be good. This movie went way off by completely recharacterizing practically all the characters. Having Aurora essentially be raised by Mal who grows to love this kid that she once cursed is heartwarming. The relationship between them is a thing of beauty. Mal becoming her replacement mother, looking out for her; and Aurora not being afraid of this creature with horns, it’s just too pure. The buildup to the curse itself, Stefan’s betrayal, his becoming King, and having a daughter were all well written. The twist on the iconic fairytale “true love’s kiss” as an impossible goal rather than some sweet backdoor to break the curse was excellently done. And then the fact that it was Maleficent herself, the woman who cursed the baby, who lifted the curse well that could just melt your heart. Mal was never all hero or all villain. She was just Mal. Also, “Beasty” is the cutest nickname ever and I will hear no contrary arguments.
2. Cruella (2021)
The final two, and in at number 2 is an amazing villain origin story. This is the story of Cruella, aka Estella. This movie is great, from the writing, to the score, to the music choices. Just excellent work all the way around. The performances were brilliant; Emma Stone handles the transition from Estella to Cruella masterfully, even though the transition itself felt a little jarring. Emma Thompson is an excellent villain. Cold, unfeeling, ruthless. She might not be as megalomaniac as some other villains but she is evil. Horace and Jasper’s re-characterization from dumb henchmen to Cruella’s family really opens up the movie to be able to deepen the characters. The makeup and costume design is impeccable; I’ll be pissed if it doesn’t win an Oscar for it. The references to the original are understated. A line here, a line there. You don’t even notice the big one until the very end of the movie. Just a brilliant show all around.
1. The Jungle Book (2016)
Finally, we hit the big one. The best of them all. 2016’s The Jungle Book is, in my opinion, the perfect live-action adaptation. This is the movie that got Jon Favreau the Lion King job. The performances from the cast, from Neel Sethi’s Mowgli to Bill Murray, Ben Kingsley, Lupita, and Giancarlo Esposito, are all amazing. You can feel and see the emotion in the faces of the animals. Shere Khan is a truly terrifying villain. During the final sequence, you really do fear for Mowgli. The choice to make King Louie a gigantic prehistoric animal instead of an orangutan like in the original gives weight to the threat of the Bandar-log. Mowgli’s own accidental journey of self-discovery that ended with him riding an elephant, something no animal would ever dare do, marked his acceptance of the fact that he is not a wolf. He is a man, or man-cub. This movie is better than the original Jungle Book.
Well, there you have it. My ranking of all the Disney live-action remakes. Was this fun? Yes. Do I think Disney should keep making remakes? No. Such is life. So, what do you guys think? Do you agree with the ranking? Leave a comment and let me know.
